Koani got straight to the point; with her, there was no beating around the bush. She spoke plainly about Cayson, and his love for Riot. It was obvious that the Grader kiom could see that it was real love, and quite mutual. Ri found her stomach doing a few nervous flip-flops as she listened to Koani's voice, wondering, at the end of the day, what the older female thought of hers and Case's relationship. Yet, despite everything they'd gone through in the past, the kiom did not seem to disapprove. Her words were simple — Riot loved Case, Case loved Riot, she could see that, and she wouldn't mess with it. Unless Riot broke the arden's heart, of course, but she never would. Hence, she didn't flinch at the threat. Riot blew a breath of air between pursed lips, but did not speak. Koani was still talking, now moving onto the real subject at hand — Zamfir. Her white-tipped ears tilted forwards with interest, and she blinked her mismatched eyes. She knew what Koani was telling her was true. Zamfir had gone under the moment Karryasa had been torn away from him, and a recovery was impossible. His soul had perished, even if his body hadn't, and it was for this reason that Ri suspected Koani may have assisted him in physically dying. What child would wait around and watch their father suffer terribly, day after day? Though Riot didn't know for a fact that Koani had helped the Arch Magos along, she realized, then and there, that if a loved one were suffering as Zamfir had, she would have made the same choice as the Grader. She didn't have time to say this either, though. Koani was pressing on, now about... Kakosenas? Riot found herself shifting her weight as she gave the other female an openly perplexed look. She knew the events of tonight had been put into motion by her chimera friend, but Ri had not bargained on hearing Koani's personal opinion of all that had happened back then. It was very uncomfortable for Riot to listen as her future mother-in-law voiced her desire to kill Kakosenas, but the banded thill remained ever silent, just listening... until her turn finally came to speak. "Who else was to blame?" were the first words to pop out of her mouth; Koani's last sentence had left her wondering. "I... understand your sentiments about Kakos. I'm sorry for what your family has had to go through, and you must believe I speak the truth, because, in a way, I am part of that family now. As you said yourself, I love Cayson, and these are his tragedies, too. It was his grandmother that was killed, and now his grandfather is dead, too. His tragedies are mine now, and everything that affects him, also affects me." Riot took a deep breath. "With that said, I am pained to hear of Zamfir's passing. At the same time, though, I'm glad. He's free, perhaps even reunited with Karryasa, and now things will smooth out for you. You can do things how you see fit, and even clear up the Grader name with all of those who frown upon it, to honor Zamfir's memory... It must have been a painful decision, nevertheless, to have helped your father die," Riot finished up, her last words spoken carefully. She wanted Koani to know that she was sure of the truth, but that she wasn't going to use it or twist it or hurt her with it.
Koani's lips pursed and her gaze shifted down to her tail which lay half curled beside her. She absently drew her fingers partially through its long pale aqua locks. Riot had unsettled her a little. She found it strange to hear someone, specially Riot, talk about her son that way. Her word choices, indicative of devotion. Was it possible that someone else loved Cayson just as much as she herself did? That idea would take some getting used to. Koani listened as Riot continued. Her words now falling back onto Zamfir. The freedom that comes with death, how Koani was now able to do what she saw fit, then came something that she wasn't quite expecting... It must have been a painful decision, nevertheless, to have helped your father die. At first, Koani was confused by that statement. Had she projected that thought to the thill? Koani could feel her insides prickling. She could deny Riot's assumption (that's all it was, right? How could Riot have proof?), she could ignore the statement altogether, or... or what? "I hope it really isn't that obvious," she said at last, touching on the subject, and discreetly admitting to the act. Helping someone die didn't seem like the correct terminology. There also was no solace in the possibility that Zamfir was once again reunited with Karryasa either. Karryasa was still lost. That fragment of her that Zamfir claimed to have saved... Koani had begun to believe that it was only wishful thinking on his part. Something his mind had created in order to help cope with the pain he was being bombarded with. A little fragment of hope. All through his suffering, Koani had been there. Right up until his end. It hadn't even been a peaceful end. How she had manipulated him. The way he had looked at her, the way his body had lurched and constricted... Koani closed her eyes and tilted her head back against her headboard. "It's difficult to place the blame fully on anyone," she began. "I blame Kakosenas, yes, but like I said, I can't completely. I have some reason to believe that she herself was a victim of circumstance. I blame my Mother as well. Karryasa knew that she was going to die. She knew. She kept it a secret from my Father, yet told me. I hate her a lot for that. She walked knowingly into her own death. Knowingly. She crushed Zamfir on purpose." Koani opened her eyes. She still had trouble comprehending her Mother's actions. I blame myself a little as well. For accepting. For not speaking up. For letting things slide by me and not trying to jam something into the cogs. She thought to herself. She wouldn't dare share this thought with Riot. Pity and reassurance were things that the Grader was not looking for. "I also blame that old witch, Sari Zeb. But then, if I do... ugh." What Koani wanted to say was that Zamfir and Karryasa had brought this all upon themselves. That ultimately it was their own fault. Koani loved them of course, her Mother more so than her Father, but each had their shortcomings.
Riot listened to Koani's words, without expression, and without comment. It seemed the the Grader was quite torn up inside, though the teenager knew such an upstanding and stoic kiom would loathe being the subject of anybody's sympathy, so Riot refused to try and reassure her. Besides, offering a listening ear was always more helpful than offering empty words. Though, after Koani had spoken, spitting out various names, tossing the blame around like a hot potato, Riot did have just one thing to say. "Perhaps you shouldn't blame yourself, Kakosenas, your mother, your father, or anyone. Playing the blame game is not going to make things easier. It will only frustrate and anger you. Why don't you focus on mourning for what is lost, and thinking about what the future holds, instead of lingering on things that will only serve to aggravate you?" She stopped there, not wanting to anger or upset Koani. That was not her intent. In fact, she wanted to lessen the Grader's fervent, negative emotions. She knew that Koani was now an adult orphan, and that, no matter how it had come about or who was at fault, the loss of her parents was striking her rather hard. She needed not to play mind games with herself that would only drive her mad - she needed to rest. Riot hoped that, despite their turbulent past, the older female would heed her advice, and give herself a break. Besides, she needed to keep her sanity, for the morning's announcements, and for the different future that would unfold for her, for Cayson, for Jaceen, for Riot, for the entire world. "Oh, and, your involvement, it's not... obvious. I just kind of... knew somehow," Riot said softly, after a moment. As she spoke, she turned towards the door, thinking it was time to leave Koani so that both of them could sleep. "I think I've bothered you enough for now. I hope you can find some rest tonight. I'll see you at breakfast, and I hope that if I can be of any help at all with the changes that will have to take place, you will let me know."
