What do you find intimidating about Shadowlack?

kk, sooooo I'mma try and do a Twine introduction thing... at least that's what my project for the next week will be I think. I'm not sure how far I'll get or if it will get out of control but I've been wanting to mess around in Twine for a while and this is some solid material to start with :3

 

@Lautir So a text game to introduce a game? That might be rather cool.

 

Well I'm not too sure how game-like I can make things in Twine, but it would definitely be a slightly dynamic way of reading and gathering information. I'm hoping to make something bare-bones enough that it would inspire others to want to tell the real stories.

I managed to cobble together some small pieces last night after fighting with the web based version of Twine: Shadowlack - An Introduction

If anyone has feedback on the format that would be great! I'm not sure if it's catchy in any way. I do know that it's annoying that you can't tell apart the Wiki links from the continuing the tread links so that's definitely something that needs to change to make it useable. And it would definitely be filled with pictures :3

 

That's actually quite slick! I should look into Twine more. If it's possible to add custom CSS or JavaScript, it ought to be really easy to do some special styling for links.

 

Yep! We could probably do some cool things with CSS and JavaScript. They need to be applied in a specific way but I don't think it's that difficult. Their CSS Wiki page.

And yeah, definitely putting some maps in their as they'll be invaluable for orienting a user. As well as maybe a link directly to the specific IC forum locations so people might be tempted to start right after reading.

 

Double posting to share official WIP1 (now with a new build with some fixed sentences)!

I had some technical difficulties with getting the CSS to work (aka I didn't) so it has a ways to go appearance wise still. But I filled out the five branches so that they lead somewhere. If you guys could poke around at it and tell me what you think that would be great. Especially any of you newer members!

Does it intrigue you? Is it too much information in a small space? Would you like to see more branches? What part of Shadowlack would you like to see shown here?

So far it only has some @Iversia art in it but I think it would be great to have something for every page, as ambitious as that would be!

I'm going to send this version to my game writing group and get their feedback on it. None of them know anything about Shadowlack so they'll be a nice clean test group to get reactions from :3 After which point I think it could be fun to open this up to other contributors, yesyes.

 

More branches. Yes! I think it all seems pretty digestible so far. Keeping it at around 200-300 words per page seems to be working quite well for readability.

I'll try to keep my ideas fairly compartmentalized.

• Something that mentions the shadier parts of Shadowlack. Eg. Where to get into trouble / illegal substances.
• A little about social class. Eg. What/where money can get you. Mostly would like to point out the economic disparity between some of Ramath-lehi's countries.
• Finding entertainment. Whether it be Menlo, the Black Rune Casino, legal sex work, or a club/bar/restaurant.
• Getting a tattoo (if only because tattoos are so culturally ingrained here)

 

@EyeoftheNyte - Yeah, I was trying to keep those in mind but kept falling into minor history lessons, orz. Are there any that you think would be easiest for newbies to get into? I mentioned The Flux a bit, the thing with the Free Mages... hmmm, we could probably use a forum wide plot sometime soon...

@Iversia - Yessss, tattoos definitely need a mention :3 All good things!

 

So I got feedback from some outsiders on Sunday. They recommend having a more specific narrator for the "game". Mostly to have a more solid voice throughout the paths as well as to help the user be more situated so it's just not some weird bodiless voice. So maybe an opportunity for a welcoming NPC.

I had more feedback which I need to incorporate in my notes but I don't have them with me at the moment, gah.